Books That Have Made Me Cry

     This post is inspired by a colleague who asked for book recommendations, “because sometimes the antidepressants work a little too well.” Amazing. Also, fuck you for finding my blog (and I mean that lovingly, but I am still considering deleting the whole thing in shame). All that aside, the following books have either made me cry, or made me feel some very intense emotions. I hope you weep too. 

     I was specifically asked not to include animal deaths, so I’ve had to cut a couple picks out of this list that would have made it otherwise. I very nearly included some sequels that have brought tears to my eyes, but perhaps I’ll save those for their own post. Not everyone wants to commit to 1,000+ pages just for some emotional devastation.  

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A Man Called Ove by Fredrick Backman

     I can’t help but compare this book to Disney’s Up. Ove is old, tired, and curmudgeonly. He’s set in his ways and goes about life exactly as his principles and routines demand. He doesn’t understand all the modern hustle, and he doesn’t really care to. He dislikes anyone that crosses his path, and he has absolutely no desire to get to know the noisy new neighbors that have just moved in across the street. 

     Dammit this book hurt me at a fundamental level. Backman is hilarious. Ove has this charming grumpy thing going for him that made me fall desperately in love with him despite myself. Before I knew it, I was grossly invested in his story. AND. THEN. THE. BOOK. HURT. ME. But like in a good way? It absolutely ripped my heart out and stomped on it until it was dust… but it also had the decency to give my heart back rather than leave me completely hollow. How polite. 

Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman

     I actually have already reviewed this book here on the blog, so this will just be a brief nod to Miss Eleanor. I still think about this book all the time. I’ve reread it several times since that initial read through in 2020. It hits just the same now as it did then. Eleanor shares some traits with Ove, in that she’s very rigidly set in her routine, principles, and general aversion to new people or situations. This book is also laced with a gloriously awkward humor amidst a very heartbreaking story. I think if you enjoy one of these two books, you’ll be sure to love the other. 

Here After by Amy Lin

     I frequently see this memoir described as “breathtaking.” Though generally an overused descriptor in book reviews, I do feel it is applied aptly here. Lin takes us through her emotional journey following the sudden and unexpected death of her husband. The language in these pages is incredibly raw and evocative. I think our society pressures us to push down our grief in order to make our emotions more palatable for those around us, or we romanticize it in order to keep ourselves one degree removed from the gut-wrenching realities of loss. Here After does none of that. I’ve never been a widow, but this reading experience brought me right to that precipice so I could look down below and feel the chilling reality of the fall. I read this book in one sitting and promptly cried on my shower floor for all the intimate pain Amy Lin allowed me to share in. 

Crying in H Mart by Michelle Zauner 

     This is yet another memoir about grief that crushed me. Zauner explores her complicated relationship with her mother following her mother’s death. She uses their shared love of food and her Korean heritage to reconnect with memories of her mother and come to terms with her identity. This book made me absolutely desperate to explore an H Mart, but it also made me reevaluate a lot of my close relationships and how I’m using my time with those people. It inspired me to be more intentional with the seemingly mundane moments–like sharing a meal– I have with my loved ones. It also made me incredibly hungry. Make sure you have snacks and tissues at the ready.

The Travelling Cat Chronicles by Hiro Arikawa

     Told from the feline perspective of the crafty and sarcastic Nana, we embark on a journey with his owner Satoru to visit Satoru’s dearest lifelong friends. Each chapter takes us through a unique visit, so the book is cozily episodic. All Japanese lit fic about cats seems to be a warm hug wrapped in some sassy cat narration, and I will always be on board with this. Arikawa really nails the aloof and crafty nature of cats in a way that only real cat people would understand. Damn, did this one sucker-punch me in the feels though…

Station Eleven by Emily St. John Mandel

     The story takes place within the timelines before, during, and after a pandemic flu sweeps across the globe killing 99% of the human population. Mandel strings together the stories of Shakespearian actors who must navigate the bleak realities of this world. You will find yourself dazzled by the depth of the characters and their stories, then everything comes together in one devastating twist of fate that will have you reaching for your hanky. 

     Admittedly, it has been almost a decade since I’ve read this one. I’m overdue for a reread. I do remember feeling intense emotions. The writing was simply enchanting. The characters came to life right off the page. When I discovered how all the threads wove together… cue the waterworks! This book was pivotal in setting the bar for a great read as I started to read in higher volumes. Emily St. John Mandel flipped a switch in my brain and powered on a voracious appetite for gorgeous writing and moving characters with this one. 

Gone: A Girl, a Violin, a Life Unstrung by Min Kym

     I give you one last memoir for the list. Min Kym grew up a musical prodigy. As she was gearing up for a career-making  world tour, her soulmate, a $1.2M Stradivarius violin, was stolen from a train station cafe just before she boarded to leave. What followed was a whirlwind of heartbreak, isolation, and tremendous loss of self as Kym yearns for her lost violin and confronts what it means to be a musician. 

     This book spoke to me as a musician. I fell out of love with professionally performing in the midst of an incredibly toxic and demanding experience in academia. I could hardly pick my saxophone out of its case for years. The evocative language Kim uses to speak about music and her violin were so enthralling. Her wordcraft compelled me to fall in love with making music again after many years of tarnished feelings. This book changed something in my heart and mind. It has found its way into being one of my all time favorites. It forced me to process grief when I didn’t truly understand the depth of it. I highly recommend the audiobook, which contains sound clips from Kym’s album of the same title. 

Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow by Gabrielle Zevin

     This one is difficult to sum up, because the book isn’t particularly plot driven. It is all about the characters and their relationships. We follow two childhood friends who reunite by happenstance in college and embark on a video game development project that makes them incredibly rich and incredibly famous. The story spans several decades as we traverse the ups and downs of friendship and the moral gray areas of human nature. 

      You do not need to be a gamer to get the most out of this book by any means, but it will certainly tickle the brains of any gamers who do pick it up. The story is really about the friendships. I’m not going to lie to you, none of these characters are particularly likeable, but I think that is what makes this story so impactful. The push and pull between the characters is tangible, so it’s incredibly devastating when they misstep or slight each other. I’ve never before read a book that so deeply explored platonic friendships and just how devastating they can be when they are unhealthy. I was so emotionally tangled in all their messes, that it was impossible not to feel the full scope of the characters’ heartaches right along with them.